I just use this acc to like shitmy sideblog: https://www.tumblr.com/livingunderaclassicrock
69 posts
hey boy don't kill yourself. green's dictionary of slang is available online and allows you to explore 500 years of english vulgarity. you can search by part of speech, source, time period, etymology, and usage. there's a whole category for gay slang. they even have specific citations listed so you can see the exact context for yourself. boy did you know that in 1927 "to kneel at the altar" was slang for "to sodomize"
I missed most of the Iraq war due to being a baby, but every time I read about it I start wondering why we aren’t all talking about it all of the time
I wish it was easier to talk about mobile phone addiction without sounding like a boomer
Marvel movies have completely eliminated the concept of practical effects from the movie-watching public’s consciousness
FAMOUS AUTHORS
Classic Bookshelf: This site has put classic novels online, from Charles Dickens to Charlotte Bronte.
The Online Books Page: The University of Pennsylvania hosts this book search and database.
Project Gutenberg: This famous site has over 27,000 free books online.
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Classic Book Library: Genres here include historical fiction, history, science fiction, mystery, romance and children’s literature, but they’re all classics.
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The Spectator Project: Montclair State University’s project features full-text, online versions of The Spectator and The Tatler.
Bibliomania: This site has more than 2,000 classic texts, plus study guides and reference books.
Online Library of Literature: Find full and unabridged texts of classic literature, including the Bronte sisters, Mark Twain and more.
Bartleby: Bartleby has much more than just the classics, but its collection of anthologies and other important novels made it famous.
Fiction.us: Fiction.us has a huge selection of novels, including works by Lewis Carroll, Willa Cather, Sherwood Anderson, Flaubert, George Eliot, F. Scott Fitzgerald and others.
Free Classic Literature: Find British authors like Shakespeare and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, plus other authors like Jules Verne, Mark Twain, and more.
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Flat World Knowledge: This innovative site has created an open college textbooks platform that will launch in January 2009.
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Light and Matter: Here you can access open source physics textbooks.
eMedicine: This project from WebMD is continuously updated and has articles and references on surgery, pediatrics and more.
MATH AND SCIENCE
FullBooks.com: This site has “thousands of full-text free books,” including a large amount of scientific essays and books.
Free online textbooks, lecture notes, tutorials and videos on mathematics: NYU links to several free resources for math students.
Online Mathematics Texts: Here you can find online textbooks likeElementary Linear Algebra and Complex Variables.
Science and Engineering Books for free download: These books range in topics from nanotechnology to compressible flow.
FreeScience.info: Find over 1800 math, engineering and science books here.
Free Tech Books: Computer programmers and computer science enthusiasts can find helpful books here.
CHILDREN’S BOOKS
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Munseys: Munseys has nearly 2,000 children’s titles, plus books about religion, biographies and more.
International Children’s Digital Library: Find award-winning books and search by categories like age group, make believe books, true books or picture books.
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PHILOSOPHY AND RELIGION
Bored.com: Bored.com has music ebooks, cooking ebooks, and over 150 philosophy titles and over 1,000 religion titles.
Ideology.us: Here you’ll find works by Rene Descartes, Sigmund Freud, Karl Marx, David Hume and others.
Free Books on Yoga, Religion and Philosophy: Recent uploads to this site include Practical Lessons in Yoga and Philosophy of Dreams.
The Sociology of Religion: Read this book by Max Weber, here.
Religion eBooks: Read books about the Bible, Christian books, and more.
PLAYS
ReadBookOnline.net: Here you can read plays by Chekhov, Thomas Hardy, Ben Jonson, Shakespeare, Edgar Allan Poe and others.
Plays: Read Pygmalion, Uncle Vanya or The Playboy of the Western World here.
The Complete Works of William Shakespeare: MIT has made available all of Shakespeare’s comedies, tragedies, and histories.
Plays Online: This site catalogs “all the plays [they] know about that are available in full text versions online for free.”
ProPlay: This site has children’s plays, comedies, dramas and musicals.
MODERN FICTION, FANTASY AND ROMANCE
Public Bookshelf: Find romance novels, mysteries and more.
The Internet Book Database of Fiction: This forum features fantasy and graphic novels, anime, J.K. Rowling and more.
Free Online Novels: Here you can find Christian novels, fantasy and graphic novels, adventure books, horror books and more.
Foxglove: This British site has free novels, satire and short stories.
Baen Free Library: Find books by Scott Gier, Keith Laumer and others.
The Road to Romance: This website has books by Patricia Cornwell and other romance novelists.
Get Free Ebooks: This site’s largest collection includes fiction books.
John T. Cullen: Read short stories from John T. Cullen here.
SF and Fantasy Books Online: Books here include Arabian Nights,Aesop’s Fables and more.
Free Novels Online and Free Online Cyber-Books: This list contains mostly fantasy books.
FOREIGN LANGUAGE
Project Laurens Jz Coster: Find Dutch literature here.
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Bibliolteca Virtual Miguel de Cervantes: Look up authors to find a catalog of their available works on this Spanish site.
KEIMENA: This page is entirely in Greek, but if you’re looking for modern Greek literature, this is the place to access books online.
Proyecto Cervantes: Texas A&M’s Proyecto Cervantes has cataloged Cervantes’ work online.
Corpus Scriptorum Latinorum: Access many Latin texts here.
Project Runeberg: Find Scandinavian literature online here.
Italian Women Writers: This site provides information about Italian women authors and features full-text titles too.
Biblioteca Valenciana: Register to use this database of Catalan and Valencian books.
Ketab Farsi: Access literature and publications in Farsi from this site.
Afghanistan Digital Library: Powered by NYU, the Afghanistan Digital Library has works published between 1870 and 1930.
CELT: CELT stands for “the Corpus of Electronic Texts” features important historical literature and documents.
Projekt Gutenberg-DE: This easy-to-use database of German language texts lets you search by genres and author.
HISTORY AND CULTURE
LibriVox: LibriVox has a good selection of historical fiction.
The Perseus Project: Tufts’ Perseus Digital Library features titles from Ancient Rome and Greece, published in English and original languages.
Access Genealogy: Find literature about Native American history, the Scotch-Irish immigration in the 19th and 20th centuries, and more.
Free History Books: This collection features U.S. history books, including works by Paul Jennings, Sarah Morgan Dawson, Josiah Quincy and others.
Most Popular History Books: Free titles include Seven Days and Seven Nights by Alexander Szegedy and Autobiography of a Female Slave by Martha G. Browne.
RARE BOOKS
Questia: Questia has 5,000 books available for free, including rare books and classics.
ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT
Books-On-Line: This large collection includes movie scripts, newer works, cookbooks and more.
Chest of Books: This site has a wide range of free books, including gardening and cooking books, home improvement books, craft and hobby books, art books and more.
Free e-Books: Find titles related to beauty and fashion, games, health, drama and more.
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Free Web design books: OnlineComputerBooks.com directs you to free web design books.
Free Music Books: Find sheet music, lyrics and books about music here.
Free Fashion Books: Costume and fashion books are linked to the Google Books page.
MYSTERY
MysteryNet: Read free short mystery stories on this site.
TopMystery.com: Read books by Edgar Allan Poe, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, GK Chesterton and other mystery writers here.
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POETRY
The Literature Network: This site features forums, a copy of The King James Bible, and over 3,000 short stories and poems.
Poetry: This list includes “The Raven,” “O Captain! My Captain!” and “The Ballad of Bonnie and Clyde.”
Poem Hunter: Find free poems, lyrics and quotations on this site.
Famous Poetry Online: Read limericks, love poetry, and poems by Robert Browning, Emily Dickinson, John Donne, Lord Byron and others.
Google Poetry: Google Books has a large selection of poetry, fromThe Canterbury Tales to Beowulf to Walt Whitman.
QuotesandPoem.com: Read poems by Maya Angelou, William Blake, Sylvia Plath and more.
CompleteClassics.com: Rudyard Kipling, Allen Ginsberg and Alfred Lord Tennyson are all featured here.
PinkPoem.com: On this site, you can download free poetry ebooks.
MISC
Banned Books: Here you can follow links of banned books to their full text online.
World eBook Library: This monstrous collection includes classics, encyclopedias, children’s books and a lot more.
DailyLit: DailyLit has everything from Moby Dick to the recent phenomenon, Skinny Bitch.
A Celebration of Women Writers: The University of Pennsylvania’s page for women writers includes Newbery winners.
Free Online Novels: These novels are fully online and range from romance to religious fiction to historical fiction.
ManyBooks.net: Download mysteries and other books for your iPhone or eBook reader here.
Authorama: Books here are pulled from Google Books and more. You’ll find history books, novels and more.
Prize-winning books online: Use this directory to connect to full-text copies of Newbery winners, Nobel Prize winners and Pulitzer winners.
ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band
Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along
Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady
Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof
Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY
Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to
Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name
Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares
Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy
Asia: Tuesdays
Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist
Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny
Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company
Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith
Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD
Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy
Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different
Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically
Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL
Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you
Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS
Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life
Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural
Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about
Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty
Bush: ditto
Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?
Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic
Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with
Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that
Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”
Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better
Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right
Collective Soul: who?
Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not
Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*
CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*
CSNY: David Crosby; meh
Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER
Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one
Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up
Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest
Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio
Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor
Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close
Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth
Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none
Edgar Winter Group: @the–blackdahlia
Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison
ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule
Essex, David: no prominent memories of him
Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell
Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?
Faith No More: I got nothing
Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop
Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential
Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself
Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip
Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill
Ford, Lita: deserved better
Foreigner: dramatically overplayed
Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box
Free: dramatically underplayed
Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot
Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter
Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass
Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does
Grand Funk Railroad: Funk
Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music
Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes
Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason
Green Day: the first of the emo revolution
Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen
Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that
Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?
Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool
Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names
Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!
Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references
Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration
Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time
Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself
INXS: Terminator vibes
Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison
James Gang: too many funks
Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative
Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*
Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*
Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute
Jett, Joan: icon
J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played
Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that
John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name
John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me
Joplin, Janis: Queen
Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire
Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic
Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole
Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically
Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject
Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes
Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)
Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons
Live: I got nothin
Living Colour: slap a decent amount
Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??
Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track
Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion
Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD
McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple
Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf
Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987
Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon
Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot
Modern English: who?
Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes
Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT
Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it
Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie
Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’
Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one
Nicks, Stevie: witch queen
Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill
Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed
Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least
Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*
Offspring: nothing here
Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy
Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard
Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money
Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*
Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good
Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?
Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled
Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’
Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say
Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig
Queensryche: neutral opinion
Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that
Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music
Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent
Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it
Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it
RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)
Red Rider: basically Golden Earring
Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull
REM: American Tragically Hip
REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title
Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie
Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit
Santana: The world needs more Santana
Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend
Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say
Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)
Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you
Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us
Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater
Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it
Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know
Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having
Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison
Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan
Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions
Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard
Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015
Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable
Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself
Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them
Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously.
Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt
Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to
Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’
Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth
Ten Years After: somehow still relevant
Tesla: not the car or the dude
The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them
The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her
The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul
The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names
The Kinks: kinky
The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile
The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours
The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have
The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it
The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s
Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?
Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern
Toto: the most memed song behind All Star
Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds
T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon
Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush
Tubes: like the yogurt
Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it
U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways
Van Halen: RIP Eddie
Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?
Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn
Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get
War: Foghat, but even groovier
Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis
Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene
Yes: To Be Continued
Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY
Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand
ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged.
3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever
38 Special: Why 38?
Just a reminder if ya wanna see all my cool posts, see my sideblog. I thought I should say something cause I have a TON of cool mutuals, but most of them follow this blog instead.
Thanks!! Peace + Love!!
(I keep updating this list so check back later)
The Beatles: 0/10. None of these people are beetles, they’re just a bunch of fruity guys from Liverpool with matching haircuts
Pink Floyd: 4/10. There is not a single person named Floyd in the band, but some of the members do arguably look kinda pink
Nirvana: 10/10. Getting high and listening to Nirvana is roughly what I imagine actual nirvana to be like
Foo Fighters: either 0/10 or 10/10. I have never seen foo in real life so either they’re pretending to fight a problem that doesn’t exist or they’re doing an absolutely fantastic job of fighting it
The Eagles: 0/10. Same as the Beatles, there is not a single eagle in this band. The name is misleading and we have all been lied to
Queen: 6/10. Partial points for Freddie Mercury
Led Zeppelin: 0/10. I don’t think any of these guys have ever even seen a zeppelin, let alone one made of lead. A lead balloon would crash faster than my hopes and dreams
The Rolling Stones: 3/10. There is not a single stone in this band. Some points added because I’m pretty sure they rolled quite a few
U2: 0/10. Despite what the name says, I am not a member of this band
Metallica: 9/10. Naming a metal band “Metallica” is like naming your dog “doggy”
Red Hot Chili Peppers: 2/10. These guys are not chili peppers. They’re not even that hot, let alone red hot
Guns N’ Roses: 0/10. How the fuck could a gun or a flower play music
Backstreet Boys: ?/10. Depends entirely on their current given location
Simon and Garfunkel: 10/10. No notes
The Doors: 1/10. Jim Morrison is kinda shaped like a door tho
Chicago: 4/10. The number of people in this band does not come even remotely close to the population of Chicago. Points added because it originated in Chicago
Earth, wind, and fire: 2/10. This is even more innacurate than Chicago. Points added because wind instruments were often used
Def Leppard: 3/10. There is not a single leopard in this band. Some of the members are probably kinda deaf by now tho
The Beach Boys: ?/10. Accuracy depends entirely on location
The Black Eyed Peas: 6/10. Not sure what the hell an ‘eyed pea’ is but the black part is pretty accurate
Imagine Dragons: ?/10. Depends entirely on whether or not they’re thinking about dragons.
Cage the Elephant: 1/10. Why would you do that. Let the elephant go
Green Day: 0/10. They’re not even green
The Police: 0/10. There is not a single cop in this band
KISS: 5/10. I’m sure they probably kissed sometimes
The Monkees: 0/10. Are you fucking kidding me
We Butter the Bread with Butter: 8/10. I can’t verify this but I have no reason to suspect that they’d lie. Butter seems like the most logical thing to butter bread with
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard: 0/10. I got really excited about the concept of a lizard wizard only to be let down. My disappointment is immeasurable
They Might Be Giants: 5/10. I googled everyone in this band’s height, the tallest guy’s only 6’1 so I wouldn’t exactly consider him a giant. Then again, I can’t really argue because the claim was only that they MIGHT be giants
The Presidents of the United States of America: 2/10. None of these people are Joe Biden nor are any of them former presidents. This is incredibly misleading. I’m pretty sure “Lump” was written about my first girlfriend tho so I’ll give them a point or two
Gorillaz: 2/10 Not quite but we’re kinda close genetically so I’ll give them partial credit
The Killers: ?/10. I have no way of verifying if they’ve actually killed before but the fact that they’re not in prison tells me probably not
The Offspring: 10/10. These guys are definitely somebody’s offspring
Arctic Monkeys: 1/10. They are neither monkeys nor are they from the arctic
Thirty Seconds to Mars: 1/10. It takes WAY longer to get to mars than that
Beastie Boys: 8/10. They’re pretty beast on the guitar
Jimmy Eat World: 1/10. Slow the fuck down Jimmy, you’re biting off way more than you can chew
Hole: 9/10. One point deducted because I’m pretty sure they had more than one hole
Rage Against the Machine: 10/10. They did exactly that
Alice In Chains: 0/10. This is illegal. Let Alice go
The Band: 10/10. This could not possibly be more accurate
Nine Inch Nails: 1/10. I can’t find any good pictures of their feet but from what I can tell their fingernails definitely aren’t nine inches long
Bush: ?/10. Not quite sure about this one, felt uncomfortable asking
The Who: 2/10. I’m not dealing with this “Who’s On First” bullshit
Radiohead: 0/10. Not a single person in this band has a radio for a head
Queens of the Stone Age: 0/10. This band should be called “five random dudes from the modern era” but FRDFTMA is a bit of a mouthful
Soundgarden: 2/10. Sound does not grow in the garden
Sonic Youth: 5/10. They’re not exactly youth anymore but the sonic part checks out
Talking heads: 8/10. There’s more to the band than just a bunch of disembodied heads but the heads do tend to talk
The Cranberries: 0/10. Decent music but I only added them so that the Beatles and Freddie Mercury weren’t the only fruits on this list
The Wiggles: 8/10. They do tend to wiggle a lot
BTW I only really use this main account for shitposts & likes. If ya wanna see some cool stuff, check out my classic rock sideblog, where I post Fanart and memes and stuff:
iñaki luffy you are so loved forever
edit:
People will literally see a sage green building and be like "what if it was white" 🙄
the whole "how to fix the USAmerican food system" thing has become a major interest of mine, and much of why I find this topic engaging is that no one seems to discuss or propose any solutions that are very good
Republicans are losing on abortion. They’re losing elections, from the midterms to red state ballot measures. They’re losing public opinion: 78% of Americans believe abortion should be a decision left to a woman and her doctor, with support for reproductive rights the highest it’s ever been.
Given all this losing, how is it possible that the GOP is still framing the debate on abortion? It’s absurd that the national conversation has become a question of when it’s fair to legislate someone’s body. With voters more furious and pro-choice than ever, the most effective message is also the only appropriate answer: never.
Yet while Republicans frame their bans as reasonable compromises, pro-choice politicians have been inexplicably taking the bait. Democrats continue to cater to an imaginary middle out of fear that they’ll be labeled extremists, even though conservatives will attach the label to them regardless. And to prove the horror of abortion bans, they’re focusing almost exclusively on the extreme stories they believe will be most sympathetic—sexual violence victims, for example, and women with wanted pregnancies denied abortions despite the risk to their lives.
It’s vital to highlight all of the harm caused by bans, and stories like these undoubtedly demonstrate the horror of these laws. But concentrating on the few experiences that Democrats believe are most palatable at the expense of the majority of cases is a grave moral and strategic error.
Every abortion denied is a tragedy. You don’t have to go into sepsis to be forever harmed by an abortion ban. You don’t need to be raped to have control of your body stolen from you.
And while the most extreme consequences of abortion bans do happen with shocking regularity, they are still outliers: Most people seek out abortions because they don’t want to be pregnant. And that’s okay—in fact, it’s critical.
Reproductive rights and justice isn’t about who ‘deserves’ care, or who has endured enough suffering to have earned an abortion. Forcing anyone to be pregnant against their will, for any reason, is immoral and cruel. Yet somehow in the hubbub of polls and bills, talking points and politics, the power of this fundamental truth has been pushed aside.
That’s why Republicans need the public debate on abortion to be distracted with fights over 12 weeks versus 15 weeks, or what medical conditions should be listed in so-called exceptions. They want Americans to forget the central compelling reality of what these bans really do: legally require pregnancy. They take away a person’s ability to control their own body and life. It is a profound existential harm.
The national conversation on abortion may be neglecting that fact, but Republicans haven’t forgotten. They know exactly what’s at stake and have planned for the suffering their laws will cause—suffering they know won’t just impact those forced to carry doomed pregnancies or victimized children, but all women and girls.
Tucked away in most abortion bans is language on medical exceptions that anticipates precisely what happens when you force people to be pregnant against their wills:
“[N]o condition shall be deemed a medical emergency if based on a claim or diagnosis that the woman will engage in conduct which would result in her death or in substantial and irreversible physical impairment of a major bodily function.” (Senate Bill 20, North Carolina)
The wording shifts slightly from state to state, but the mandate is the same: pregnant people will be made to stay that way, even if a doctor believes they will kill themselves.
What better proof is there that conservative lawmakers know how vital it is to one’s humanity to have control over your own body? How ‘reasonable’ and ‘commonsense’ can a law be that predicts women becoming suicidal as a result?
That’s why it’s so important that Democrats focus on more than just certain tragic stories when talking about abortion. Every case is an extreme case, because every woman’s life and free will is important.
Besides, by paying disproportionate attention to the experiences that strategists believe are the most sympathetic, Democrats are giving the GOP a critical political opportunity: the ability to avow that they’ll tweak abortion bans to account for those particular cases. In fact, Republicans have already started doing this—using exceptions and amendments to claim they’re making their laws more lenient.
The truth, of course, is that these are changes in name only. When Idaho Republicans added language to their abortion ban to “clarify” allowances for medically-emergent abortions, for example, doctors in the state were furious over the farce. Boise-based maternal fetal medicine specialist Dr. Lauren Miller said that politicians were “trying to make it look like something happened, when in fact, this makes no meaningful change.”
But even if Republican exceptions were genuine, and allowed for abortions in certain cases—what about everyone else?
Before Roe was overturned, one in four American women would have an abortion in their lifetime. That’s a huge portion of the population now without care. To abandon them, even in our talking points, is unthinkable.
It also doesn’t make any political sense. Support for abortion rights is the highest it’s ever been—why would Democrats cede anything at all?
We know why Republicans are framing state bans as sensible middle-grounds, despite all evidence to the contrary. They desperately need voters to believe that they’re not extremists. (A tall order when the nation’s leading anti-abortion groups want to make birth control illegal.) And in a moment when Americans are really unhappy with abortion bans, the hope is that painting 12- and 15-week restrictions as a concession will make voters feel as if Republicans have compromised or lost something.
But the strategy isn’t working. A recent poll from NARAL Pro-Choice America showed 70% of respondents don’t buy the idea that a 15-week ban is a “reasonable compromise.” And an ABC/Washington Post poll reports that only 18% of Americans believe abortion should be regulated by law at all.
And so remaining on the defensive—whether it’s allowing conservatives to define what a ‘middle ground’ is, or fighting solely to restore Roe and nothing more—only gives credence to one of the biggest abortion lies of all: the notion that Americans are split on the issue.
In a moment when Republicans across multiple states are working to stop citizens’ right to vote directly on abortion, there is perhaps no myth more important to debunk. Because if Americans believe that the country is evenly divided on abortion, they’re much less likely to ask questions when restrictions are passed against voters’ wishes.
That’s the same reason conservatives are pushing for a national abortion ban by calling it a ‘national standard’ or ‘national consensus’. Anti-abortion activists won’t use the word ‘ban’ because they need federal abortion legislation to sound like something everyone agrees on. Otherwise, voters might be reminded that a small group of extremist legislators are enacting bans that Americans decidedly don’t want.
For years, the conventional wisdom was that conservatives won the messaging war on abortion. Whether it was true or not then, it’s certainly not the case now. That’s why there’s no reason for pro-choice politicians or mainstream activists to mince words or tiptoe: If the GOP isn’t winning the debate, why in the world would we let them frame it?
Anytime an anti-abortion activist or lawmaker starts to talk about their ‘reasonable’ abortion bans, they need to be asked why a so-called moderate bill needs to anticipate women becoming suicidal. If they talk about ‘exceptions’, demand that they produce a single person who was able to obtain an abortion using one. And when Republicans argue that Americans want a ‘compromise’ on abortion, ask why, then, they’re so afraid of letting voters have a say.
Let them attack us, let them spin and lie. Because it’s not “extreme” to believe no one should be forced to carry a pregnancy against their will. It’s not “radical” to point out that pregnancy is too complicated to legislate. How do we know? To start, because these beliefs are the norm.
And that’s what Democrats need to be reminding the public of every day. These are bans being passed against our wills, laws that are hurting people every single day. Not just those with tragic stories—but anyone with the ability to get pregnant. It has never been more important to lead with the truth instead of responding to their lies.
Abortion rights has historic support, it’s time we all talk like it.
the uncommon allergy haver to anticapitalist pipeline
So I posted these two images that I made in a post together just shy of a year ago, and the post got 10,000+ notes. Today I saw a meme with a text convo of someone sending one of them to a military recruiter (which is extremely funny) and I thought “oh I should find that post again”
but when I went to find it, it had completely vanished. not just the original post, but even reblogs of it. I couldn’t even find screenshots anyone had taken of the original post. it wasn’t brought to my attention as a reported post, tumblr never even contacted me about deleting it, it just… disappeared
really gets the noggin joggin
Feminists with no class consciousness are rly like "Poor Marie Antoinette she was a victim of child trafficking, sold as a 14 year old little girl to a 15 year gross old man she had never met, they didn't let her keep anything she brought from one palace while moving to another palace, she was an immigrant struggling in the highest position a woman could take in a foreign country, the rich ladies at court were so mean to her she had no choice but to LARP as a milkmaid in her special cottage in her palace to cope, she was a teenage queen for 20 years when the Revolution broke out, the mean revolutionaries accused her of SA'ing her son, ok it was one guy who I refuse to learn the name of who was immediately booed by everyone else in the court but let's blame it on the revolutionaries as a whole because they were so mean-"
Pete Buttigieg is just a faggot.
It's very important to me that younger queers understand this: to the people who you're trying to be more respectable for when you say things like neopronouns set the trans movement back or you're why the cishets don't accept us or including [aces/bi people with the 'wrong kind' of partners/non-binary people/kinksters/non-passing trans ppl/furries/polyam people] just hurts us, can't you wait until we get all our rights before we talk about some of yours? -- to those people? Pete Buttigieg is just a fag.
On Sunday at Pride Northwest, some kids -- late teens, early 20s -- asked what our button I survived Reagan for this? meant. All of the queer adults at the tables making up our ad hoc counter looked at each other and sighed a little. Emet and another adult started to explain the way that the Reagan Administration handled -- or didn't handle -- the beginning of the AIDS crisis. How many people died. How much we were ignored. The Ashes Action. The Time Magazine article which explicitly blamed bisexual men for passing the pandemic to the cishet community, playing on all the worst stereotypical bullshit. The way that even when the CDC started paying attention, they were so focused on gay men that they ignored AIDS in the lesbian community, leading to the "women don't get AIDS, they just die from it" poster. And so on.
I finished counting out change and passed the last Bear Pride raised fist pin over to a bear a little older than me, then turned my head and interjected, "they didn't care until it started infecting more than just the fags." I turned my head back and handed him his change. He laughed bitterly and said, "remember when they called it 'gay cancer?'"
That what I need you to understand. The people for whom you are folding yourself into smaller and smaller boxes will never see you as anything but a freak. A queer. A dyke. A tranny. A fag.
Never.
These are people who will stand by and let you wither away and die alone, gasping for breath in a cinderblock room, and not even claim your ashes, and they will say you deserve it, because of your lifestyle. If they speak of you at all it will be by the wrong name, with the pictures you hate the most. They will curse at your lover, throw him out of the home you shared, and steal the gift you gave last Christmas to throw it in the trash just so he can't have it and they'll say Jesus loves you! while they do it. They'll feel good and righteous and blessed and holy and pure for doing it.
And for them, you spit in the eye of your sister. For them, you disavow your sibling. For their sake, you trim away bits of your heart and lace yourself up tight. Never too loud. Never too queer. Never inconvenient or embarrassing, never asking for too much.
Pete Buttigieg is what happens when your Boomer dad turns out gay. Middle America. Parents still married. Suburban-sprouted. Valedictorian. Harvard-educated. Rhodes Scholarship. Military service. More power to him: I hope he and Chasten are very happy together. Genuinely, I do.
You couldn't create a more respectable gay if you grew one in a lab run by concerned voter focus groups.
But Pete Buttigieg? Is just a fag.
That's the part you don't seem to get: when they abandoned us, they abandoned all of us. Rock Hudson was a beloved movie star and even personally friendly with that horrid pair of ambitious jackals. Nancy Reagan refused to help him get into the only place in the world that could treat him at the time, and he died.
It was 1985, 4 years after the CDC first released papers on what would eventually become known as HIV/AIDS and 7 years after the first known death from an infection from HIV-2. Reagan hadn't even said the word AIDS by the time Hudson died.
Pete Buttigieg is just a fag, and so am I. Unless I'm a dyke, which seems to depend on who's yelling what from which window and what day it is.
Yes, there will be people who genuinely love and accept you. Those people are worth all the frustration of the rest, thankfully, and they're the ones who love you in a pup mask or a leather harness and a neon jock like the ones sold by the men up the row from us last weekend. They're the ones who laugh out loud when you tell them you hid the word "dyke" in your company name, the ones who love you in all your messiness and uncertainty and the way you don't fit into neat boxes all scrubbed up and clean.
Most cishets, though... well, they don't actively mean you specifically any harm, at least not when they have to look at you. Not when you're right there in front of them. Maybe they'll be okay with you, personally, especially if you're the kind of gay who makes a good rhetorical device, and as long as you remain a good rhetorical device.
They need people to know that they don't have a problem with the gays, after all, and there you are, being all convenient. You make a nice token, and as long as you do, well. You're useful.
But they call you by your deadname when you're not around, and they put the wrong pronouns in your medical record even though they met you years after you came out, and they won't put themselves out to save you. Not one little bit.
I didn't want to be here again. The year I graduated from high school was the worst year of the AIDS crisis. The world into which I became an adult was a world in which an advisor and friend to Reagan, William F. Buckley, openly advocated for forcibly tattooing the HIV status of HIV+ gay men on their buttocks (and IV drug users on their forearms), and in which my father not only told me that when I was 14 or so, but when was told me that he'd advocated for that tattoo being "over their assholes."
(Buckley wrote that in '86, but he doubled down on it in 2005.
Fucker.)
But yeah. I didn't want to be here again. I wanted my daughter to inherit a better world. I wanted Obergefell and Lawrence v. Texas and Hope & Change to really mean something. I work for it, today and all days. I haven't given up.
I need you to know that, too. This isn't a white flag. I'm not surrendering. This isn't over. To misquote Henry Rollins, this is what Marsha and Sylvia and Stormé and Leslie and Brenda and Auntie Sugar trained us for. This is punk rock time.
But I need you to understand that if Pete Buttigieg is just a fag, if that human embodiment of a Wonder Bread, mayo and Oscar Meyer bologna sandwich is not respectable enough for them -- and he's not -- then the rest of us have absolutely no hope of measuring up. Not even if we trim away every colorful, beautiful piece of our community, not even if the Sisters Of Perpetual Indulgence vanish into the ether, not even if we sacrifice the five elements of vogue on the altar of white supremacist cishet middle-class conformity: we can't trim ourselves down to something they'll accept.
The only other option is radical acceptance of our queer selves. The only other option is solidarity. The only other option is for fats and femme queens and drags and kinksters and queers and zine writers and sex workers and furries and addicts and kids and the ones who can look us in the eye and see all of us to say we're here, we're queer, get used to it just the way we did 30 years ago. It's revolutionary, complete and total acceptance of our entire community, not just the ones the cishets can pretend to be comfortable with as long as we don't challenge them too much, or it's conceding the shoreline inch by inch to the rising waters of fascism until we've got nowhere left to stand and some of us start drowning.
That's it. Either it's all of us or it's none of us, because if we leave the answer up to the Reagans of the world and all the people who enabled him in the name of lower taxes and Democrats who wring their hands, weeping oh I don't agree with it but we'll lose the election if we fight it right now, the answer is none of us.
The brunch gays can come, too, I guess.
“Mean girls all grow up to be nurses!”
“Mean girls all go into social work!”
“The mean girl to teacher pipeline!”
Y’all, these are just pink collar jobs. The reason you think there’s so many “mean girls” in these fields is because they’re all like 97% women. Of course some of them are gonna be assholes. There’s assholes everywhere.
We get it. Your job isn’t like other girls’ jobs. It’s a cool job.
not to be a fucking boomer but holy motherfuck i’m so tired of young queers on social media having temper tantrums about flags and words and fanfiction and just shit no one gives a fuck about in real life.
here’s a list of things i’ve encountered in irl queer spaces that no one batted an eye about that i have seen nuclear level freak-outs about on tumblr:
- trans man calling himself a lesbian
- trans man calling himself a femboy
- lesbian being married to a trans man
- trans man and trans woman calmly and respectfully talking about reproductive transphobia (me and my voice teacher who i adore)
- gay men in puppy masks simply existing
- trans woman not doing voice training/feminization because she likes her voice the way it is and somehow not “tRiGgErInG” the women around her with her scary deep Male VoiceTM
- queer people saying slurs in normal speech when we talk about history or community or for self identification
- talking about how cishets are shitty to us no matter how we identify and not policing other people’s language when they talk about their personal experiences
i am far from the first person to say this but oh my god go outside. meet other queer and trans people in person at queer events. if you can’t do that, see if there are any streaming events you can attend. but just get off social media. stop thinking of the queer community as this nebulous online thing with rules and regulations created by and for white tumblr teens. it’s a real living breathing group of people that has infinitely varied experiences that a 20 yr old white tumblr user will never be able to succinctly boil down into a one liner. definitions mean nothing. stomping ur feet on tumblr bc u saw a trans man use a word u don’t like or a trans woman like a thing u think is gross and bad is stupid and u should not do it. grow up and go do something fun.
Sooooooo
Lemme get this right. We can’t house the homeless population in SF, Oakland, and other cities but we can build “nap shelters” for our poor exhausted eviction enforcers??? Is that right????
Yes it’s very important for solidarity with workers but, and maybe this is an unpopular opinion, workers should have solidarity with poor customers. Like ignore shoplifting, be sensitive when ppl are using EBT cards, that kinda thing.
I think trans people need to be MORE threatening, tbh. “I’m not a big scary transgender” speak for yourself. “Trans people are not a threat” they should be. “A trans person used this bathroom and no one got hurt” and it’ll stay that way if you learn to mind your business. As long as there is a violent reactionary base against trans people, there should be a scarier group of trans people for them to be afraid of pissing off.
okay i'm gonna say something and you all have to give me a chance. ready?
we need to stop making fun of poor american southerners who distrust the government. it's real easy to call them all conspiracy theorists and dismiss them, but half the time, its built off of a genuine feeling of being abandoned by the infrastructure meant to keep them safe.
in appalachia, a lot of people lost their homes because of coal mining operations. a lot of people worked in those mines, and then when the mines stopped being profitable, they got tossed out with the bathwater. a lot of appalachia is poor, malnourished, and i don't blame them for not trusting rich politicians who dismiss them as stupid and lower class.
if yall actually listened to half the things poor southerners say, you'd realize that a Lot of common leftist complaints are virtually identical to the rural grandma who doesn't hold with electronic money and politicians. it stems from a genuine feeling of abandonment and ostracization by the people who run the country. functionally, someone living paycheck to paycheck in the city in a tiny apartment has infinitely more in common with someone from rural appalachia than a politician. high rent, high taxes, food insecurity, feeling lied to by those in power, a general sense of frustration. it just sounds fancier coming from a city mouth than one with shitty teeth and a southern accent.
tl;dr stop dismissing southern people as stupid. they're absolutely right not to wholeheartedly trust politicians, because they've been fucked over by them time and time again, and honestly, id rather talk to a southern person who openly distrusts their representatives than someone from the city who wholeheartedly believes that Frederick Jamestown OldMoney III genuinely cares what people think and can be convinced to change his ways.