All Right, Enough Rest. Time To Go Back Out There And Be A Public Nuisance. I Need To Make It My Mission

∅ Hi, my name is Blue! ∅ I drew my first Blue! Aren't you proud of me?

∅ Hi, I'm Blue! ∅ Here are some hearts and diamonds for my new Tumblr friends :)

Self-love is important. I am a good person and I deserve to be loved and respected.

Okay, I can take photographs and do tracings of them.

I lost my job. Affirmation of the Day: My name is Blue, and my existence has value.

Okay, maybe my community is more generous than I thought. I got 6 dollars in four hours of begging. That meets my fundraising goal for today. I just want to try to make 5 dollars a day to pay for my nicotine habit. I'm sorry I went off the rails there. I hate it when my anger takes over. The anger, I think, was a response to putting myself in a very phobic situation. Rejection hurts, but I should not wish others ill. Some days, the mental illness wins.

I tried to quit nicotine again yesterday. Cue the instability and mental screaming. I couldn't do it. I bought some more nicotine. Panhandling annoys the conservatives, and it will pay for my nicotine. I really need to get out there and panhandle. The worst thing that could happen is a mugger tries to kill me and take my money. I am a giant. I have never been mugged before. The first person who tries to mug me gets to find out what it's like to have all their joints dislocated one by one. But that probably won't happen. I'll take a picture of the panhandling spot and post a tracing this evening.

Happy midnight! Today is a new day, and the start of a new era. Today I draw for you the sacred Triforce. Daily Affirmation: My name is Blue, and my past does not define me.

Okay, I need to get back to my art therapy. It is important to have a purpose in life. Daily Affirmation: My name is Blue, and I can be happy if I try.

I am sorry that I have trouble finding interesting things to say. The words just are not there. I try to think of words and there is nothing. I had to forget about my past. I have no stories to tell. I feel like I have a blank or empty personality. I am still figuring out who I am. Daily Affirmation: My name is Blue, and I am a new person.

I am addicted to the hatred of others in my community. Dear hometown, I drink your hatred of me like the finest craft root beer. I will never stop panhandling. I will never stop begging. Because your hatred makes me feel alive. All I am doing is asking for help. The more everyone in my community hates me, the more confident I am in my moral superiority. I don't care about your money, hometown. That is just a bonus. I want you to give me all of your disgusting, evil hatred for the poor, because I love it!