Reblog If You Have Stretch Marks

#i love one (1) supermodel dragonslaying trio

#50”you won’t be laughing soon” + #65”SORRY I COULDN’T HEAR YOU OVER HOW HARD I KICKED YOUR ASS” (Jasper Hale x Reader)

Prompt: “Hi hello you said you take requests? Can I request a fluff playful kinda thing with Jasper x Reader (preferably human reader but feel free to just run with it how you want) with numbers #65 and #50? I’m. I’m just iN NEED OF JASPER WITHLOCK HALE THINGS AND YOU’RE SO GOOD AT THEM HDYBCBJ”

#50”you won’t be laughing soon” + #65”SORRY I COULDN’T HEAR YOU OVER HOW HARD I KICKED YOUR ASS”

Word Count: 778

A/N: Sorry if it kinda sucks (?) maybe. I just really liked the prompt and I hope you too, anon! Feel free to request something else whenever you want. Also, I decided to go with a vampire reader because I couldn’t come up with an idea for a human one.

(Gif is not mine)

Feedback is always appreciated. Don’t be shy if you want to leave an ask or just want to talk to me, I’m always here!

Watching Jasper and Emmett fight could be on top of the list of my favorite things to watch, they could go around looking like tough people, really intimidating to everyone, but in reality, they are two big children.

“You are so predictable, Emmett, that’s why you always lose” Jasper said while he laughed at the sight of Emmet laying on the ground with his arms wide open but quickly got up and growled.

“(Y/N) please watch closely as I kick your boyfriend’s ass” he said looking at me for a quick second but turned around to look at Jasper again.

I laughed loudly, I knew Emmett could take Jasper down, not easily but eventually he could bring him down.

“Please, demonstrate me, Em, I will love to see that” I crossed my legs so I could be more comfortable on the ground where I was sitting.

“You know you are supposed to encourage me, not him, right?” Jasper scowled at me, a tiny bit of jealousy on his voice.

“Oh, shut up and fight already” Emmett protested before I could even say anything and he launched at Jasper but he quickly dodged him and took the opportunity to try and grab his arm to hit him but Emmett knew that he would do that and moved out of his reach; they stayed like that for a couple of minutes, throwing punches, some landing perfectly and other not so much, they both tried to push the other to the ground but they fought so many times together that they knew their moves, honestly they were really predictable.

At some point Emmett was actually able to pin Jasper down, bringing him to the ground with a loud noise and Jasper’s expression on his face made me laugh so loud that I was sure all Forks could hear me.

“Oh my god, Jasper, that was horrible” I got up as quick as I could and moved to where Emmett was standing and highed five him. “Emmett, that was amazing, ten out of ten” he laughed as well and I turned to look at Jasper still lying on the ground with the same expression as before.

“I let him win, it’s called compassion, (Y/N)” he said as he got up walking slowly towards me.

“Oh yes, I’m sure that was it” I replied still laughing.

“Come on, dude, accept it, you suck” Em said from behind me. “At this point, I think you kinda lost your skills, and your dignity, of course”

I couldn’t help but to laugh yet again, there was something about Jasper’s face that it was just funny and how childish he was when he loses.

“You won’t be laughing soon, (Y/N)” he said looking at me with a playful look in his eyes, I grinned and crossed my arms tilting my head a little.

“You really think so, love? Are you really challenging me after that shameful performance of yours?” I replied, furrowing my eyebrows.

“Please, don’t hold back, sugar” he walked away, moving just a couple of meters from me, turning to face me and winked.

“I wasn’t planning to, dear”

He launched at me first but I dodged him, he turned around rapidly and threw two punches at me, once again I could dodge the blows and I took the opportunity to grab his arm and twisted so his back was pressed on my chest, he was strong but I was quick and pressed my foot down on the back of his knee making him kneel but he managed to stand up a little but before he could even stand up properly I swiped my foot hitting his making him lose balance and pushed him with one arm to the floor, his face facing the ground. I let go of him and laughed once more, I already lost count of how many times I laughed today.

“Oh my god, Jasper, this is embarrassing” Emmett shouted from where he was standing grabbing his stomach and laughing along with me.

Jasper got up from the ground looking at me with his eyes narrowed and he pressed his lips together, I ran to where Emmett was and he hugged me tightly, both of us still laughing.

“That was incredible, amazing, I loved it, (Y/N)”  he said when he pulled away, with a smile so big that I could see his dimples.

“I let her win just like you, don’t flatter yourse-“

“Sorry, Jasper, I can’t hear you over how hard I kicked your ass!” I shouted at him and turned to leave with Emmett, while be heard Jasper complaining behind us, but we ignored him and continued walking.

GUYS im really bored in my art class so i did this bHAHAHAHA

watch me swing around perth now

these are without a doubt the cutest photos to ever grace my presence

Jasper x Reader

AN: Sorry this took so long, I had it written but when I went on the plane and refreshed the page, it deleted. I am truly sorry!!!

(WARNING: SELF-HARM)

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Y/n and Agent Hotchner do not get along. He constantly undermines her work and favors other agents. After an especially difficult mission, y/n snaps. She files for a transfer request, but she has to wait three weeks before she can leave the BAU. Tensions rise, and it's a waiting game of who will break first.

Warnings: graphic descriptions of violence, explicit sexual content, 18+ minors dni. see warnings on chapters for specifica

chapters posted every tuesday, thrusday, and saturday

chapter 1

chapter 2

chapter 3

chapter 4

chapter 5

chapter 6

chapter 7

chapter 8

chapter 9

chapter 10

chapter 11

chapter 12

chapter 13

chapter 14

chapter 15

chapter 16

chapter 17

chapter 18

chapter 19

chapter 20

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Stranger: hi how are you

Me:.....

My friend:......

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Me at 3am scrolling through tumblr