James And Regulus - Blog Posts

headcanon:

sirius black LOVES $uicideboy$ and listens to them religiously.

sirius also keeps a shrine for ruby and $crim right next to the shrine he made for himself.

plot: sirius got dumped.

james: do you feel like you weren’t enough? is that why you feel so choked by your emotions?

sirius: i know i’m not enough, otherwise he wouldn’t have left me.

marlene: did you get the weird breathing trouble yet?

sirius: what, asthma? i’ve had that for ages.

james and marlene: *burst out laughing*

sirius: *gives in and starts laughing through his tears*

people who were killed after dying:

1- dumblewhore: by all the marauders collectively, but lead by james.

2- peter pettigrowsomeballsplease: by sirius black and strangely regulus black too.

3- snivellus snape: by lily evans because “how dare you sacrifice my husband and son but ask for me to be spared?”

4- remus lupin and mary macdonald: they were suffocated by a hug from all the marauders.

sirius: i feel like i absorb the positive energy from the people around me.

remus: so you’re kind of like a dementor?

sirius: no, i don’t suck the joy out of people.

remus: debatable.

sirius: WHATDOYOUMEAN?!

modern au: the marauders all live and study together at a muggle university, but they’re going through ‘two weeks’ of online classes.

marlene: *bursts into the living room, laptop in hand where james, sirius and dorcas are sitting*

marlene: WHY THE FUCK DID YOU LEAVE THE MEETING?

sirius: THE TA TRIED TO PUT ME IN A BREAK OUT ROOM WITH STRANGERS AND IM NOT HAVING ANY OF THAT.

marlene: COME BACK TO CLASS, YOU PUSSY.

sirius: IF YOU’RE GONNA CALL ME A PUSSY, YOU BETTER PUT ‘EATER’ AFTER IT. MY WAY- MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY!

remus: *unmuting himself and speaking*

remus: sirius, you’re gay and marlene, learn how to mute yourself.

-1975-

james: snape will never have a love life.

remus: someone’s bound to find him…tolerable.

james: how about we place a bet?

remus: 5 galleons.

-1993-

remus: *takes one look at snape, and immediately runs out, looking up at the sky*

remus: COME BACK YOU ARSE, I OWE YOU 5 GALLEONS!

sirius: *places a newly rolled blunt on the street*

sirius: it’s a highway…get it? highway? cause blunt and road…y’know?

james: *throws his shoe at sirius*

lily: *hexes him bald*

remus: *takes off his wedding ring and places it in sirius’ hand*

regulus: *updates his insta bio to ‘only child’*

plot: severus is confronting sirius after getting drenched with charmed water balloons.

severus: there’s a special place in hell just for you.

sirius: *placing his hand on his chest dramatically and wiping away a fake tear* f-for me? a special place in hell JUST for ME? that’s so sweet, so kind, and so welcoming.

james: hey…what if mike was actually short for micycle?

lily: it’s 3 in the morning, and i swear to merlin if you don’t shut up, you will wake up without a tongue.

james: *mumbling* sirius would’ve found it funny…

lily: then by all means, go sleep with him instead.

plot: mother james is nagging sirius to get his transfiguration essay done.

james: it’s due TOMORROW MORNING, and it’s 9:15 pm, get a move on already!

sirius: well you said it yourself, it’s 9:15…which is basically 9:30 which means that it’s almost 10:00 and i really have to be in bed by 11:00. so…i haven’t the time to do anything, really.

me: i don’t chase, i attract.

the guy i like: *exists*

me:

plot: the slytherins are failing to get into the gryffindor common room to get sirius and james who just pulled another prank on them, while the two potter boys blast “insane in the brain” by cypress hill.

james: *dancing on a table* cops, come and try to snatch my crops.

sirius: *twerking by the portrait hole* these pigs wanna blow my house down.

remus lupin would 100% wear sandals with socks and think it’s peak fashion, sue me.

james potter is the type of guy to clap when the plane lands, i said what i said.

plot: regulus is talking to sirius about his new boyfriend.

regulus: i’m trying to come up with a new nickname for him, but nothing’s sticking with me.

sirius: alright, what reminds you of him? like something pleasant.

regulus:

regulus: …rugs.

sirius: what?

regulus: i like…rugs.

regulus: rugs are fluffy, they sometimes come in cute shapes too. he’s pretty cute, and he’s got fluffy hair.

sirius: you’re nicknaming your boyfriend after a type of carpet?

regulus: rug…reg and rug…rug and reg…i like it.

sirius: *groans into a pillow*

I just made the realisation that jegulus' initials are R and J 😭😭

Romeo and Juliet forever destined all soulmates with the initials R and J to be a great big, tragedy.

jegulus raising harry is cute but let's be honest jegulus gives off major girl dad vibes

Regulus is the ‘safe dad’

James is the ‘fun dad’

James loves Regulus cause he always has fun when reg is around.

Regulus loves James cause around him he feels safe.

I don't know why but I feel like James and Regulus are so Gomez and Morticia coded.

Phases of the Moon Pt. 2

Remus had spent much of the last week in a makeshift window seat on the second floor. Although the cement he was sitting on was uncomfortable, it was better than running into Sirius, or interacting with anyone, really. He was able to get through a novel he’d been putting off reading, and he barely thought of Sirius. Barely. 

He watched through the window as Sirius and James chased each other on their brooms. They flew swiftly through the air, ducking and dodging each other, narrowly avoiding the walls of Hogwarts and the trees that seemed to be leaning away from them, more than the wind would allow.

They had made a few laps around the castle before Sirius came to a halt, in front of the window Moony was crouched in. 

“Hi,” he mouthed, his joy fading quickly, a sad smile replacing it. 

Remus wanted to reply, to fix things, but he also wanted to never see Sirius again, so he turned away, crawling out of the window and making his way back to his dorm. 

He staggered up the stairs, but they were always reluctant to let him up, instead leading him into the boys' dorms. This had always given Remus quite a bit of euphoria, but right now, he had somewhere to be. He willed the stairs to cooperate, making his way inside the dorm just before Sirius showed up. 

“You should really go talk to him,” Lily persuaded.

“You should go talk to him!” Remus shot back, standing at the counter.

“Why would that help anything?” Lily gave him a confused glare, continuing, “This is an issue you boys need to sort out on your own.” 

It’s times like these that Remus truly questioned whether Lily was actually twenty years older than the rest of them. 

Somehow, Sirius had once again reached the door to their dorm. Even Remus had to do some heavy bargaining with the stairs, and none of his excuses would work for Sirius.

“Let me in! Lils, I’m sober this time!” Moony raised an eyebrow in Lily’s direction as she reached for the door.

“You have to settle this, you can’t live the rest of your life wondering what could have happened.” Lily’s words struck a chord; as much as he really didn’t want to talk to Sirius, he’d thought about what he would have said or done differently quite a lot lately. 

The door swung open, Lily waved Sirius in, then retreated to her room. She mouthed “You got this” to Moony before closing her door. 

“Hello, Black,” Remus said, sitting in an armchair, leaving Sirius to take the couch, which was far too big for one person.

“Hello, Lupin,” he replied, looking from Moony’s platform boots, to their jeans, to one of their old jumpers, finally looking up at their face. They held an emotionless expression, moving their eyes to look slightly beyond Sirius.

“Moons, I really shouldn’t have said those things. I know that you wouldn’t cheat on me. And I would never think that you’d be shagging a Slytherin.”

“What, ‘cause you don’t think they’re dying to get their hands on me?” he fired back, and with a quick change in demeanour, he continued, “Why are you even here, Black? It’s not like you’re ever going to accept me as your boyfriend!”

“Well, I know damn well the Slytherins are dreaming of snogging you, and even more of them will want you when you show them who you really are,” Remus seemed shocked by this response, his eyes darting from Sirius to the floor.

He continued, “And I think maybe you’ll want one of them more than you want me,” he whispered, almost too quietly.

“I could never want anyone more than I want you,” Remus whispered back.

They sat in silence for a while, until Moony moved next to Sirius on the couch. He rested his head on Sirius’ shoulder, grinning.

Phases of the Moon Pt. 1

Remus steadily eased the door to their dorm shut, returning from another one of his late-night searches through the library’s restricted area.

“Find anything interesting?” Lily asked from her seat on the couch.

“No, on either side, no way to make me feel like a girl, no way to make me look like a boy,” 

“Remus, I agreed to cover for you so you could look for ways to be you, not change who you are,” Lily said sternly.

“But if there’s a way to fix me, I should be looking for that option too, no?” There was a genuine question in his voice, but the sorrow, the years it took for him to even acknowledge himself for who he was, hid deep in the same statement. 

“Moon, you don’t need to be fixed, at all. You’re perfect just as you are, and the only goal of this search should be to make you more comfortable.”

Moony sat with that statement, letting his thoughts envelop him. 

As Lily heard someone stumbling into the corridor, she called, “Not it!” snapping Remus out of his thoughts.

She briskly retreated to her room, passing the duty of answering the door to Remus.

“C’mon Lils, I answered last time!” he called to her, eliciting only a chuckle in response. 

In the meantime, Sirius tripped his way up the stairs, disoriented and drunk.

“Prongs! Let me in, you idiot!” he hollered, banging on their door.

“Wrong room, love!” a call came through the door.

“Awww, Moony, you can let me in, can’t you? I’ll explain to McGonagall if we get caught!”

“Sirius, just go back to your own room!” Remus said sharply.

“Moons,” he drawled, “just let me in, I promise, it’ll be fine.”

Slowly, the door between them eased open, but neither of them had touched it. Remus turned around to find Lily, with her wand pointed at the door. 

“I was sick of you two yelling for everyone to hear,” Remus glared at her as she moved towards him.

“It’s time to tell him,” she whispered in his ear, heading to the kitchen.

“You trying to steal my lover, Evans?” Sirius growled, stepping into the dorm.

“Of course not, Pads, they’re all yours!” She pours herself a mug of tea and retreats to her room.

“Moons!” Sirius grinned at his lover, going in for a kiss.

Remus dodged him, resisting Sirius’ smile, no matter how impossible it was. He had different things to worry about right now, like how to tell his lover, his star, something that could change everything. 

“You should really be in your own room,” Remus groaned at Sirius, attempting to distract from the matter at hand.

“Oh, it's quite nice to see you too, Moony,” Sirius said sarcastically.

“You know that’s not what I meant, but this is the girls' dorm, and, well, how did you even get up here?”

“You know me, I have my ways, now are we gonna keep bickering, or are you going to kiss me?” 

“Did you really come here just to kiss me? At 2 am?” Sirius ignored the question, instead taking in Moony’s outfit, trailing his eyes up and down Remus, in an oversized shirt and what Sirius could only assume were boxers.

His heart skipped a beat and then sank. Who’s boxers would Moony be wearing? Why would they be wearing anyone’s boxers? Why wasn’t Moony in Sirius’ boxers? 

Sirius tried to say anything else, to answer the question, tell Moony why he was actually here, anything but ask about the boxers, but he just couldn’t. Moony was in someone else's boxers, he had to know who’s. 

“Where’d you get the boxers?” Sirius asked, the anger seeping into his gravelly pitch.

“Don’t remember, I’ve had them for a while,”  this is not how Remus had pictured this conversation.

“Has this really been going on for a while?” Sirius practically screamed, air quoting the last part.

“What?” Remus asked, his brows furrowed. 

“You know exactly what!” Sirius shouted, pacing the room.

“I really don’t!” Moony warned, anxiety building in his chest.

“Just tell me who you’re shagging!” Sirius cracked, lunging towards Remus, towering over him.

“I’m not shagging anyone- I’m really not-” Remus staggered backwards, tears streaming down his face, breath coming in shallow sobs.

“Okay, if you’re not fucking anyone, then who’s boxers are those?” 

“It’s not what you think!” Remus shouted back, his voice shaking.

“So who is it? One of the Slytherins?” he uttered the last word in disgust. 

Remus’ thoughts spun, wondering what could make his lover think such a thing.

“No, Sirius, they’re mine!” Moony yelled, seeing Sirius cock his head in confusion, he continued “They’re my boxers! Okay?”

Remus broke down in tears, blubbering. He sank to the floor, his back pressed against the counter.

Lily emerged from her room, sternly eyeing Sirius as she poured a glass of water for Moony.

“You really couldn’t have handled that any better?” she says to Sirius, handing the glass to Remus.

“Well, they’re wearing boxers! What was I supposed to think?”

“You’re supposed to trust the person you’re with and be able to discuss things in a calm manner. And, while sober, preferably.”

“I was calm and slightly sober,” he seemed to take in what he said, “that’s a lie.” 

“You should go,” Lily said quickly, before glancing at Moony, “that alright with you, love?”

Remus stayed still for a few moments before nodding.

Sirius stalks over to the door before looking back at Remus, sorrow flashes across his eyes, rapidly replaced by unease. He quickly turned around, slamming the door behind him. 

As soon as Sirius was out the door, Remus sank further into the floor, banging the back of his head on the counter.

“I just thought he’d get it, Lils! I didn’t think he’d accuse me of cheating!” he bawled, pushing his fists into his eyes. “Do I really seem like a cheater? Someone who would shag a Slytherin?” 

“Of course not, Moon. Now stop hurting yourself and come sit with me.”

Remus makes his way to the couch, tears still clouding his vision, fury shaking his palms. 

“He doesn’t deserve you,” Lily said quietly, laying a blanket on the two of them.

I'm the biggest regulus kinnie

I have a 'i hate u all' face, I like man who are kind of dumb and sporty, I want to drown in a lake, my family is disfuntional and I'm probably autistic

Also I'm probably gonna die young

The Marauders decided to go to Vegas and lose James, who didn't want to drink too much because he "wanted to look perfect on the best day of his life". Sirius/Peter who accidentally drug them because they wanted everyone to loosen up and have fun before one of their own is sacrificed to the societal construct that is marriage. Wolfstar who end up marrying when high. The trio steal a cop car, get arrested and use their one phone call to call Regulus.

On the other side of the world in Amsterdam, the Skittles are in a similar predicament - somewhere during the night, they lost regulus. Rosekiller got married as a gag, Pandora is losing a finger and Dorcas started a riot.

Both of their hunt take place at the same time. Neither party lets the other know that the groom is missing.

Hi friends.

Does anyone know of a fic like the Hangover films but about Sirius, Remus and Pete trying to find James the day before his wedding with Regulus?

Or the other way round. Barty, Evan, Pandora and Dorcas are looking for Regulus a day before his wedding.

I need it.