*Sonic Using A Phone Because It's My Personal Headcanon That He'd Truly Be Lost Without Autocorrect*

Alejandro: Let’s fight. I’m in a shitty ass mood right now.

Rudy: About what?

Alejandro: I don’t know. What’s your favorite animal?

Rudy: …cheetahs?

Alejandro: Fuck cheetahs.

Kipo: Hey is anyone d-

Wolf: Distressed?

Benson: Delusional?

Hugo: Dead inside?

Wolf: Down for murder?

Benson: Disappointed with life?

Hugo: Depressed?

Kipo: Done with their work—what is wrong with you all??

Gaz: Ohhh, I bet you Ghost took my saaaw.

—

Gaz, grabbing the saw from Ghost: 🖕🏾🙂

Ghost: 😐❔ *Gaz walks away*

—

Gaz, talking like he’s on The Office: Ghost and I are friends 😌

Gaz: We only hate each other at work.

Mickey, who just had throat surgery and is using a text to speech app to communicate: “Have you ever had a Krispy Kreme doughnut?”

Ian: 😐

Mickey: “Was it crispy?” 👁️_👁️

———

Mickey: “You want sex?” 😃

Ian: 😒

Mickey: …

Mickey: “YOU WANT SEX?” 😃

Omega: _STOP FORGIVING MY CRIMES!_

Omega: _I WORKED SO HARD ON THOSE._

Rouge, patting Omega's arm: It's alright big guy, shhh...

Cop: Miss Rouge, this is supposed to be a private interrogation. You have to leave the room.

Rouge: He has abandonment issues! Stop forcing his hand!

Cop: ...

Omega: 👉👈🥺

*fighting Black Doom*

Shadow: You said he was gonna eat my soul!

Omega: _IT WAS FUNNY!_

Shadow: NOT TO ME!!

Rouge, flying: You both have issues. 🙄

Shadow: Of course I have issues!

*Black Doom roars*

Shadow: THAT’S MY FREAKING FATHER!!!

Kipo: He may be a criminal, but he is still a person;

Kipo: And he is my brother.

Wolf: He tried to turn everyone into solid gold.

Kipo: …he’s adopted.

(Shadow and Rouge hanging out on some rooftop, laying down, looking up at the stars)

Shadow: ...

Shadow: Rouge?

Rouge: Yeah?

Shadow: ...have you ever wanted to be a caterpillar?

Rouge: Uh...no, the fuck?

Shadow: Just a question, no need for that foul language.

Rouge: Ugh, you sound like Blaze when she's in a good mood. *punches his arm lightly, smiling*

Shadow: *chuckles softly*

Rouge and Shadow, staring at the night sky: ✨🌃

Rouge: Why'd you ask, Shadow?

Shadow: ...

Shadow: Just...you know...

Shadow: They eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Shadow: Sounds nice is all.

Rouge: Hm.

Rouge: You do know that they have a life span of two weeks, right?

Shadow: That can be another highlight.

Rouge, immediately sitting up: Shadow, no- 😨

Gaz, high on painkillers: Did you know…

Gaz: Did you know that when you pet a cat…

Gaz: The cat is more cat-

Gaz: B-

Gaz: … 🫥

Gaz: Because you’re catting the pat-

Ghost, tasked to watch him: 🤨

Gaz: And the cat feels so the cat act…

Gaz: And that’s why the cat is 😃👍🏾

Gaz: *passes out*

Sonic, lovestruck: You're so pretty...

Shadow: Yeah, pretty depressed.

Sonic and Shadow: ...

Shadow: *looks at Sonic with realization* You were flirting, weren't you?

Sonic, deeply concerned: Well I was, but now I'm wondering if you're okay.