Jon Snow/reader - Blog Posts

The Wall

♫- adieu mon homme by pomme

| angst | 967 words | season 1 

jon snow x reader

summary:  your lover needs to go to the wall to join the night’s watch and you have to say goodbye to each other. 

a/n: if you don’t know french, I recommend you to look up for the lyrics of the song because I am pretty sure that it is written for jon snow. anyways enjoy my first fanfiction! ♡ 

dt: @tacheriepelagie​

                  you were talking with robb in his chambers when you heard a knock at the door. you rushed to open the door, expecting it to be jon. and you were right about it, it was your lover. he was all you ever wanted in a man; kind, caring, intelligent and   …handsome. you couldn’t think of being without him in this cruel world that you were all living in. you loved him despite everything .

                   you comforted him most of the nights because he was receiving a lot of hate from his step-mother for being a bastard. it was not his fault but yet he was suffering because of his father’s decision. it was catelyn stark’s fault too, you thought. and hell, you hated it. you hated the thought of him getting hurt at his step-mother’s worthless words. he was finding love and peace in your touch. the kind that he should have received from his mother. But you two were in love and nothing could’ve come in between you two, right?

                 ‘(y/n), i’ve been lookin’ for you everywhere. i was worried that you were hiding from me.’ he said with a sadness in his eyes. you furrowed your eyebrows at his expression, not knowing the meaning behind them.

                 ‘why would i be hiding from you, jon?’ you asked with curiosity while putting your hands on his chest, to be closer to him. ‘i actually came here, hoping you to be here.’

                 ‘i thought you heard the news.’ he placed his hands on top of yours and sighed.

                 ‘what news?’ you asked, a glimpse of innocence in your eyes.

                 ‘gods…’ he shout his eyes close and gave a little squeeze to your hands before abandoning them. ‘i should leave you two alone.’ said robb while closing the door behind him.

                   ‘i… , i wanted to be the one to tell you, that …i need to leave tomorrow with uncle benjen to go to the wall.’

                 ‘for what?’ you said, couldn’t believe the words that just come out of his mouth.

                   your lips started to tremble at the thought.

                 ‘to join the night’s watch?’ you mumbled as if saying it louder would have made it more real than you wanted it to be. he nodded, looking in your eyes deeply with the same look when he entered the chambers. you knew it was hurting him too as much as it did to you, if not more.

                  you felt your legs couldn’t carry you anymore, so you held onto jon.

                   you were holding him so tight that you never wanted him to go away, that you wanted this all to be a nightmare. jon held you in his arms for a while, not wanting to leave you. those seconds felt like years in your lover’s arms.

                 ‘(y/n), don’t do this, please.’

                he looked at you with his brown, loving eyes. it was hurting him to see you this way. But at that moment, he was looking for validation to kiss you one last time.  he was eager of your lips, of your taste of apple, cherry and lilacs. you loved those scents; a different yet a beautiful mix.  

                 you were so eager for him too, knowing that this will be your last time, was too much to handle. you just wanted to be in his arms forever, not caring about anything. you knew that probably his step-mother wanted him to go there, to spend his time until his last days on the north of the winterfell without contacting anyone, without fathering no child, without having you. you hated everything in that moment, you thought. but at least you had a chance to say goodbye to jon snow, to the one that you will never forget. the one that you’ll search for in other men.

                and with that, you crashed your lips to his. at first you were too hungry, too desperate for each other. it was rough and wild. your eyes were both closed, because you wanted to remember every single part of it in the future. but still, not knowing how to forget this tragic moment.

                later on, it became soft and deep. you both wanted to take things slow at one point. he was so sweet and gentle, trying to not hurt you. he felt like if he acts rough, you will crumble into pieces and start to fade away. he never wanted to lose you. but he had to. there was a difference between them and he hoped that you would understand how hard it is for him too -but you already knew it.

                then, he paused to take a look at you one last time before he went to his chambers to pack his stuff. but you weren’t ready for him to go yet.

               ‘please jon.’ you said while being unable to open your eyes for a few moments as if opening them would change the cruel reality.

              but... he was already gone, not wanting it to be more painful than it already is. you felt tears falling down your cheeks but you knew how much he loved you and he knew how much you loved him. it was the only thing that you were able to hold on to at that moment.

               but your last kiss was very meaningful and it was telling that;

                           ‘this was a goodbye, not a farewell my love.’