* OH LOOKIE, AN UPDATE !
Alrighty, since I'm actually becoming more active, I'm following old mu.tuals again with a happy heart !
However I know a lot of you thought I just up and left after receiving help earlier this year. In fact I got quite the few anons about it on old blogs, demanding to know why I didn't just find the time or that I was letting people down, especially with commi/ssions (though I haven't forgotten ! Unfortunately just needing more storage, time and am working with a freezing laptop). Well, there's a reason for that ! Ready to hear ? I ALMOST LOST MY DAD TO KIDNEY FAILURE AND THEN ALMOST C.OVID.Ā Read on if you must ! Just know, Iām happy to be coming home. <3
After 10 days in the ER (and suffering a bad fall due to an idiot fucking nurse) he's finally on a safe version of dialysis. He's gotten so skinny, I can now see his ribcage. Just these past couple months, I've managed to help him hold food down again after 6 months of constant throwing up. He's still barely able to take our stairs/walk around on his own, though he is slowly getting stronger. I'm the only one in the family willing and able to do his dialysis for him. I suffer nights without sleep due to him waking me if he needs something and I do it. I suffered a heart attack back in July 29th because the stress of everything even BEFORE his ER visit took its toll on me and my heart defect, and now I have to work up my health/strength again. We're still not financially stable. My computer is finally sputtering out so I'm barely able to do the best I can with it now. I almost abandoned my dad during a very bad fight with him that now I have to take talk therapy for in order to control my anger once again. (We're good for now though). We got exposed from his damn dialysis nurses and even now we are waiting to see if we're fully okay. It's looking good though, but he's the most vulnerable so I'm still worried.
This is just a SHORT version of everything that has happened since March, but even then it was building up before that too. I am STILL doing the best I can and now I have one sister who helps me as best she can too. I am still suffering misgendering and now slight tra/nspho/bia in this home, and I am working on moving out while making sure my dad will still be taken care of as well. (I've come out twice now and my family is still in denial)
So, the point for those feeling entitled to my details ? FUCK ALL OF YOU RUDE ANONS WHO THINK I ASKED FOR HELP AND JUST BAILED. I didn't. Family emergencies will ALWAYS come first, and I can't even BEGIN to thank those friends who helped me keep sane through most of it all. I'm sorry I caused doubt, for just going MIA, but I had no choice. My focus went to keeping my loved one ALIVE. But now that things are settling down, new, scary routines being conquered. I'm ready to make a comeback, return HOME. And I'll be DAMNED if anyone makes me uncomfy about doing it.